Greatest Living Poet

* What's worth $10: a New York Cosmos movie that doesn't interview Pele or a No Wave documentary that bestows inheritance of the No Wave Spirit onto The Yeah Yeah Yeahs?

* How do government investigators pose as 17 year old pregnant women?

* Why does a photo of Regie Cabico come up first when you do a google search to determine is Manohla Dargis is hot or not?

* I heard a guy say the word "shit" on CNN this morning. Will CNN be fined by the FCC? And will President Bush? If so, goodie, goodie.

* What general manager would pay this guy $15 million next year and not expect to be immediately fired? And then possibly taken out by snipers. And fed to maggots.

* Was the mind of a 12 year old boy placed inside Rosario Dawson while she was jailed during the RNC?

* Was Bukkethead interviewed for this?

* Can you help Minette release her latest clothing line on time? Or will your sleuthing abroad meet an unfashionable end?

* When do you think was the last time he actually rubbed a torso? 1979?